Question:

Namaste Ektaji,

Does the dissolution of the restlessness around the ‘I’ dissolve the identity hook? Or is it the other way around? Or does it work both ways?

Answer:

One is not always aware of the identity hook unless the restlessness surrounding it has been noticed. Once noticed, it becomes clear that this restlessness is the ‘I-feeling’. The ‘I-feeling’ is proof that there is some kind of false identity that one is hooking onto. When one realizes this, one starts evaluating the impressions created by the identity hook.

For example, you watch a romantic movie, where there is unconditional love portrayed between the hero and the heroine. The impressionable mind gathers romantic impressions from the scenes. After the movie is over, you turn to your spouse and expect a romantic gesture. This happens at such a subtle level that you don’t realize that there is an expectation lurking. Hence, you have no idea that you have now hooked onto the identity of a spouse in this moment and are expecting a gesture from the partner. This expectation creates restless energy that continuously lurks sub-surface until fulfilled.

The moment you start recognizing that there is a restlessness or an I-feeling continuously lurking below the surface, it gives you the clue about the hook of a false identity. It is restlessness that hints towards an identity hook, not the other way around. If the restlessness were unnoticed, the identity hook would not be recognized.

On recognition, the restlessness must be observed with care. One cannot push it away by merely willing to. Instead of resorting to drama, the wise choose to observe it without expectation or story creation. Mere observation dissolves the restlessness.

When the restlessness dissolves, the identity hook dissolves too. The identity hook is not tangible or easily perceptible. It is tough to grasp due to conditioning. The restlessness is more tangible, easier to grasp, simpler to observe, and easier to dissolve. The identity hook automatically dissolves.

Hopefully the question has met its answer.