Storm of Emotions in Relationships
Question:
I am going through a lot of stress in relationships, too much storm of emotions in relationship with one particular individual. Please help!
Answer:
There are definite steps to always follow irrespective of who/what is the cause of this storm of emotions:
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- First of all, relax. Mind creates pressure by repeating what happened. Drop this repetition & relax.
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- Recognize that you are in a storm of emotions. People are usually unaware about what is happening within their own minds. This storm of emotions is extremely turbulent.
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- Recognize the cause of the storm. You have learnt ‘Accept people & situations as they are’ but what you are doing wrong is that you have accepted the pain & rejected the person, instead. This is the main cause of your storm!
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- Do not try to resist it. It is the flow of Karma & Karma is like a strong flowing river which has a massive current right now because of the storm. If you resist the current, you are going to be hurt even more, therefore just flow with it. Remind yourself, you are responsible for everything, whether it is the previous karma with this person which is coming back at you now as a storm or whether it is your own reaction to this storm that will come back in future.
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- Remind yourself that you are bigger than the storm, it just seems big right now, but it is only an illusion.
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- Finally, face it. Stand up tall, open your arms & say to the storm ‘Come, I am ready to face you’ you will notice a change in the intensity of the storm soon.
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- When you struggle with the water current, you drown. When you let go, you float! Remind yourself of this unwritten truth! That’s why a corpse floats while a struggling living being drowns!
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- Now, take a step back and look at the situation as a witness/ as a third person. What would you advice a person, who came to you with this problem? You have the answer within yourself; silence the noises in the mind & you will find the answer.
As the storm comes repeatedly, you will have to repeat steps 1-8 again & again until the karma expires. Remember, the greatest truth is that ‘everything is temporary’. This karma will expire soon. Until then, face it & take it in your stride like a lion/lioness. Do not be a mouse!
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Really very powerful and effective. This post fell at the right time to face the current situation and figure out how to get back on track. Thank you very much
Thank you Ektaji, this has been extremely effective for me.
From the Advaitic perspective, it is not a doing. The words or actions that bother us are not the doing of an individual, but a happening in the Flow of Consciousness.
No use pointing fingers thinking someone is the doer. We have to accept it as part of the Flow.