Dispassion or Ego?
Question:
Is it important for the outside world to accept my change in personality/ my growing dispassion? I don’t care about or see the outside world and when an ego of an external person/world comes up, I concentrate to focus on myself and the present moment and the external world dissolves. Does this make me non-compassionate, or will it evolve over time?
Answer:
Dispassion is a very natural maturity that happens to every sincere seeker on the spiritual path. If it is happening to you naturally, be with the happening….. as long as you are sure it is not the Ego!
Remember, Dispassion cannot be manipulated
You cannot force it to ‘not happen’ when it has started naturally. You cannot force it to ‘happen’ when it is not happening. It is what it is!
But be careful that the Ego is not using the excuse of ‘dispassion’ to cover up its devious ways. Here are a few check-points to be aware of:
- Dispassion can never be devoid of compassion. If it is so, then it is the Ego, not dispassion.
- Dispassion cannot condemn anyone. If condemnation is existing, then it is the Ego, not dispassion.
- In dispassion, the world just disappears, it does NOT exist. People/Situations/Things don’t need to be avoided. If you are avoiding intentionally, then it is the Ego, not dispassion.
- Dispassion has a very positive vibe about it. If there is negativity, then it is the Ego, not dispassion.
If you are sure about the non-existence of the Ego as described in the above points, then it is the sprouting of dispassion.
The difficult phase of dispassion:
Initially, you will have to go through the struggle of dealing with all kinds of weird equations arising between you and your loved ones on account of baby dispassion sprouting. Lets call it dispassion sprouting pains/birthing discomfort. There will be unrest within you. There will be unrest in the people around you because of it. Be with it. You will learn to accept it soon. Similarly, others will grow to accept a new YOU. This will cause restlessness for some time but have the courage to be with it!
Then slowly, it will settle down. A time will come where a happy equation acceptable to both will get established. This could be at the cost of losing some relationships in some cases and you will have to learn to accept that too.
Whatever happens, tread carefully dear as we never know when the Ego can raise its head and spoil the flow! Veetraaga bhava!

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Have a Spiritual Question? Ask Ekta
Hi,
Teacher Ektaji has very good points. I will just add my personal experience.
I used to be a chatter box. At times my wife would get irritated with my constant commentaries.
Some years into spirituality and I am man of few words. I speak only when necessary and only if I have something valuable to add to discourse. Otherwise, I am content to be a mute spectator.
This transformation did cause distress for my wife and family. But eventually they started welcoming the lower content of higher quality.
Silence leads to serenity. Your environment will start getting filled with Sattvic energy. If you could see Aura’s you will realize, instead of odd colors, your environment will be filled with White/golden glow. Everyone will feel tranquil just being in this Sattvic, positive, serene, environment.
And your family will eventually start welcoming this positive transformation in you and around you.
The checklist is beautifully written and very helpful.
God loves you!