Connect with the Master internally instead of the external physical body!
I did feel a strong connection to my Guru when I did the course. But 3 years later now, I don’t feel anything. When I go to Ashram, I see people in crowds getting excited about Guruji, to take his blessings, to take a photograph with him. But I don’t feel that excitement and sometimes this raises a question whether if I’m being a good devotee or not? Has the connection faded? How to deal with this.
Remember once upon a time long long ago, you craved for toys and teddy bears but now you don’t. Today, you don’t hate toys, you don’t have any negativity towards them, you have simply matured, you have simply outgrown them. The same happens when you come onto the spiritual path…. maturity is inevitable dear. Initially, the mind keeps running after all the beauty on this path, especially the Guru. The mind is like a little child. It is pulled easily by attractive things.
Following the Master’s word is spirituality. ‘Following’ Him does not mean ‘physically running’ after him. It’s ok for beginners on the path. Slowly, maturity dawns and the initial running after fades away, you start giving more importance to your personal growth and applying the knowledge that the Guru is giving you. You realize that the Guru is far more profound than a Rockstar and does not need the kind of attention that a Rockstar needs. His only intention is that slowly you will start following his words and dive deep into your own Self and attain Self-Knowledge.
You are maturing keep it up! Few experience this maturity of dispassion.
Here are 2 questions answered by Gurudev on the same lines:
Question: Guruji whenever I see you I start running after you. Is this devotion or lack of self-respect?
In the beginning you run, it’s ok. But then you should learn to stop and look within. Dive deep within yourself then I will run after you and the whole world will run after you.
Question: After coming to the ashram I just feel like running behind you. I don’t even feel like doing any seva. What should I do?
By the way, I’m not running anywhere! (Laughs) I’m very stable, you better be stable. I don’t run after anything, it is better you also don’t run after anything; just be! Know that whatever you have to get, you will get it. This is a place to just settle in the depth of yourself, and be content.
So now that you understand your dispassion, what to do now?
1] Remember, a Guru has a higher purpose and that’s why he chose to give us so many techniques and meditations. So follow those techniques, go deeper into the Self and start following the Guru’s word [knowledge] to the T.
2] If a doubt arises about your own devotion for the Master, remind yourself that in ancient times, a Guru was revered and given space. People would not crowd around him but maintain a distance and still manage to establish an inner connection with the master.
Check your inner connection. Do you have an internal connection with the Master? Are you progressing spiritually? Have you changed and metamorphosed into a butterfly yet?
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